What is Love?



What is Love?  This is a question that has been asked for ages and can be a difficult one to truly answer.  However, I believe that there are several perspectives that I can share with you that might make it a bit easier to understand.

What is Love?  Let’s take a look…

Definition – Love

According to Dictionary.com there are 28 definitions to the varied uses of the word Love.  Almost seems fitting to a concept that is hard to define, that there would be so many different uses and descriptions of it.  Now I am not going to go into all 28 variations like they did, but I do want to cover the major ones here.

If you travel over to Wikipedia.com and search for Love you will also find a plethora of definitions to sort through, including interpersonal, cultural views, religious views and more.

But alas, you didn’t come here to just go look the term in the dictionary or the digital encyclopedia did you?  You are looking for something deeper and thought provoking, so let us get a move on…

Romantic Love

Romantic Love is like a fire burning in our hearts.

This is probably the reason why most of you have found this page as you are looking for answers about finding the right partner in your life.  In today’s modern world this can be an extremely difficult task especially when it comes to having the time to do so.  With education and work eating up so much of our time it can be hard to know where to even start with your limited time.

I have had all kinds of thoughts throughout my life on what it meant to actually love someone and to want to be with them, however it has only been in the recent years that it has really come into focus for me.

I started to get my clarity as I watched my oldest son reach manhood and start dating women.  He had several different girlfriends and each one had different effects on him and that is what piqued my interest.

Her love of him helped to make him a better person.

The one girl he dated for quite some time really cared for him.  What I saw though was that it was her that was pushing him to be a better person.  She got him out of his comfort zone and off his beaten path.

It wasn’t until he had moved on to the next girl that I really came to realize just how important a piece of the puzzle that was.  I started looking at my situation with my wife and how being with her made me want to be a better person for her, to make her happy.

“They” say that being with a partner is about compromise.  I think that when you are with someone that makes you want to change to be a better person for them, you have begun to learn the art of said compromise.

Be a Better Person

This is the beautiful woman that inspires me to be a better person.
I keep my wife’s picture close by at work.  She inspires me daily to be a better person.

So in short, the roots of being in love with someone is having a willingness to change for them without having to be asked.  Sometimes this may mean you stop doing something you enjoy, because you know your partner doesn’t like it.  Sometimes it means trying something new because your partner does enjoy it.

We do this because we want our partner to be happy and when they are happy, so are we.  I know I have uttered the words many a time, “Happy wife, happy life.”  All kidding aside though, when we truly love someone we tend to do whatever it takes to ensure that they are experiencing a positive life.

This is why we strive to be a better person for those that we love as we want them to be happy, but also because we want them to accept us and love us back.  Acceptance is a key cog that is often overlooked in this complex equation of Love.  When we feel rejected by those whom we care for, it is an extra deep wound that we experience.


Feel the empathic link with your partner and be mindful of both of your feelings.

As you grow closer to your partner you will also establish an empathic link with them.  What I mean by this is that you will really begin to feel their emotional state and this can be a good or bad thing.

It is important to be mindful of your own emotions so that when you feel your partner’s that you can differentiate between them and act in an appropriate way.  You see if you are not careful, you can let their bad day creep into your state of being and instead of raising them up, you fall down with them.

When your partner is experiencing negative emotions it is vitally important that you strive to be their anchor for them and not to allow the influence of them to deter from the situation.

I myself learned this lesson the hard way in recent times.  My wife and I have been struggling after 22 years of no significant fighting.  Now over the last year we have experienced many tough times together.

In the beginning I let the raw emotions combine together and instead of holding my ship steady for her I allowed the negative emotions to cloud my judgements and how I acted.

The last year was very stormy weather for our relationship, but we weathered through it.

As this last year progressed we both came to the conclusion that the only reason that we were upset anymore was because the other was upset.  When we had that epiphany it really hit home for me and helped me to start correcting my behaviors.

Now when my wife is having a bad day or is upset, I do my best to stay positive and to be strong for her.  It is not always easy and sometimes I still make mistakes, but I make sure that when I do, I acknowledge them so that I can learn from them.

It is also important to know that we don’t need to be in our partner’s presence to feel this emotional connection that we have established with them.  Often I have been able to pick up on a sudden change of feelings with what seems no provocation, only to learn later that I was picking up on something that my wife was experiencing at the time.

What It All Boils Down To

Find that person that makes you want to be a better person.

In essence, without writing a whole book here, what it all boils down to is that connection established between two people.  One that drives us to better ourselves for the other and to truly feel what they are feeling.

So when you are looking for that special someone or maybe they are already in your life, think about how they make you feel about yourself.  If you want to make improvements in your life because of them, then you are on the right track.

The Same goes for being able to connect with them on an emotional level.  When you can feel your partner’s state, especially when apart, then you have strong bonds of Love forming.  Just remember it is very important to be mindful of your emotions versus theirs and making sure to support your partner properly.

What About Love at First Sight?

Article: Everything Happens for a Reason

Another question often asked is what about Love at first sight, is it possible?  While in my younger days I was skeptical of this, I am now a firm believer in that it can happen.  I am also a big believer in that everything happens for a reason in this life and it would only make sense then that some would have this occurrence.

While this was not the case for me in life, I have met many people that I have had instant connections with.  It was almost like I had just ran into an old friend and felt immediately comfortable in their presence.  Between these times and the research that I have done throughout my life, I know that it can and will happen for some.

Love Outside of Romance

 Forgiveness as a way of life
Article: Forgiveness as a Way of Life

Love is just not a part of our romantic lives, as it plays a role within our families, friends and so much more.  It is the glue that bonds us together and as I have gotten older I have also realized that is can be the answer to many of our problems.

You see it time and time again with the various great prophets of our world’s past.  They taught us to forgive others and that my friend is a key component of Love in this world.  When we are able to forgive others, we are showing them Love and compassion.  We also give them a much better opportunity to learn from their mistake.

You can learn more perspective on forgiveness in my article:  Forgiveness as a Way of Life.  Understanding this process can help you in leaps and bounds when it comes to growing the amount of love in your life.

What is Love? … The Answer!

Yup, that is what I am saying.  The answer to the question is:  the answer!  Love is the answer to so many of the problems in today’s world.  When faced with a difficult situation, no matter what area of your life it may be in, bringing in love to the equation will greatly help resolve the problem.

Love is the answer.

If we all made love one of the highest values in each of our lives, the world would change dramatically for the better.  Love is the guiding light that can evolve us as a society into a new age and way of living.

Love allows us to forgive.  Forgiving allows us to have inner peace.  Inner peace allows us to live at ease.  Living at ease allows us to live together in harmony.

In Conclusion

Please share your thoughts and perspective with us.
Please share your thoughts and perspective with us.

While love is the answer and can take us down a much more harmonic path, it is still unique for each one of us.  We all bring that one unique bit to the equation and that is ourselves.  The concept may be the same, but we will all experience it differently and that is what makes it so powerful in our lives.

I would ask that you please share your perceptions of love with us here so that together we can grow and travel together in harmony.  Whether it is a story about love in your life or just your thoughts and views on the topics that I have discussed here, it all brings value to the table.  The more value we bring here together; the better chances we have of helping the next visitor.

If you enjoyed this perspective and are intrigued to learn more, you might enjoy some other articles that I have written here:

Thank you for stopping by, I hope to see you again!

James W D

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12 Replies to “What is Love?”

  1. This is great. Love is something that everyone is looking for but many struggle to actually find. Breaking it down and explaining the different types of love. Talking about empathy, and romantic love. Self love, and love outside of romance.

    This is something that should be shared with everyone. Love is the answer to so many questions. In a world where we struggle to find love, and see it basically disappearing we need more or this going around. Great job!

    • Josh, thank you for your kind words, they mean a lot to me. I certainly agree with you that we need more of this going around. This is exactly why I started this site in the first place, to help spread love and knowledge that can help us all to make the world a better place.

  2. You did a great job on a difficult subject. What I know now is that without inner harmony and connection with your higher self, love for another is superficial. You can’t look outside yourself for something you lack.

    • Henning, First off, yes it certainly wasn’t an easy task and I appreciate your positive comment. I would also agree with you that it is hard to love others if you do not love yourself. It is hard to be a better person because of another, if you don’t see the value within yourself first.

  3. A great and useful website where I can learn all I care about the subject . You really have a lot of interesting information . Very nice articles, I’m glad I found you ! Cheers!

    • Thank you Rob, I work very hard to make sure that I provide quality content and food for thought for my readers. I am glad you found me as well!

  4. I love your post and your website as a whole. I can relate with the Law of Attraction and how it intersects with love. It’s all about giving and showing love in order to receive it back.

    • Thank you Clarisse, your kind words are much appreciated. Yes the Law of Attraction certainly intersect with Love and when you life a life based off of it, you will find much more of it flowing through your life.

  5. Beautiful, James! I’ve had a major change in my perspective of love since I began meditating and practicing yoga…I’ve learned that we ARE love. It’s just a matter of being mindful, as you teach, and accepting ourselves for who we are.
    My new favorite quote: “…love isn’t something you have to earn, win, or deserve. Love is who you are. Your true self is pure love, infinite awareness, and unbounded joy.”
    ~Deepak Chopra
    I try to read this several times throughout each day…I think it’s sinking in!

    • Thank you Barb! I am a firm believer that we are evolving into a more loving state of being. So yes I do believe that we are love and as we learn to embrace that we will begin the process of evolving and move onto whatever lesson comes next for humanity. We still have a long road ahead of us, but I believe we are working are way along at a good pace now.

      Thank you for sharing that quote. Deepak Chopra is certainly a very wise man!

  6. Great article James!
    Love truly is the answer to all the problems. It doesn’t mean that you’ll always agree with the other but it does mean that you’ll understand them more and forgive them if they made any mistakes. No holding grudges and always being supportive of one another. It would be a remarkable place if everyone just loved one another. And although you joke about there phrase “Happy wife, happy life”, I totally agree with that phrase. Keeping her happy and seeing her happy actually makes me happy.
    Keep up the good work!

    • Thanks Andy, much appreciated. Yes, we may not always agree with each other, but when we add love into the equation we will have a better understanding as to why there are differences and to be able to accept them. Yes I did “joke” about that, but like you said keeping her happy keeps myself happy as well.

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